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Ellen Chiang, fellow San Franciscan, fellow Cal Bear, fellow Lowell nerd, “lay down on the Caltrain tracks near the San Bruno station before being struck and killed by a northbound train”. This occurred this past Tuesday, July 1, at 1:15 pm, according to a Caltrain spokesperson.

I last saw Ellen at our high school reunion, this past December. She seemed cheerful, just as I remembered her in high school and college. Back in school, Ellen was among the most dedicated and intelligent of my classmates. She was short and a bit socially awkward, but she was generous and pleasant to be around.

Sad.

I first heard about this last night in an email circulating among high school friends. The email described the cause as a “traffic accident”. I was shocked and saddened. This morning, I found this article on SFGate that pointed towards suicide as the cause. Right now I feel… disturbed? grief? upset? I don’t even know. Is “icky” an emotion?

I had high hopes for Ellen. She was always successful. I had just hoped that she’d be happy. What happened? This comment on SFGate shed some light on the situation:

“Ellen must have been in a desperate mindset to commit such an act. I worked with Ellen for several years. I didn’t know about her medical condition until later, but it was something related to her bones. She was on heavy meds the last time I saw her and was obviously in terrible pain. I guess the pain got so bad that she couldn’t live with it anymore. I choose to remember Ellen when I first met her- a bubbly, happy person full of life and glad to be alive. She literally bounced about with joy to be working and living the life she loved. You can’t know what you can be driven to do when you are in such pain, mentally and physically. I hope I will never find out. God bless Ellen and her family. They will be in my thoughts and prayers.”

Well said. God bless Ellen and her family. They will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Posted on July 3rd, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: diary worthy | No Comments »

First, a rant:

I was listening to KQED’s radio program on prisons and the state budget problem. A listener called and said, “We’re putting our money in the wrong places… the cost of keeping a person in jail for a year is that of a Harvard education.”

The radio show host said, “That’s an apt comparison.”

Um… yeah. So let’s just take all our inmates and send them to Harvard. That’ll show them.

Education is Expensive

Harvard costs $34,998/year in tuition and fees. Stanford tuition is $34,800/year. UC Berkeley costs $26,232/year for out-of-state students and $7,164/year in fees for those in-state. Even San Francisco State will run a cool $13,626/year for non-Californians, according to CNN Money. That’s a lot of cash, especially when we consider that the median household income is $48,201/year.

In a year of economic downturns, everyone — especially government educational institutions — feels the financial pinch. Budget cuts will hurt public universities. To balance their books, universities must either reduce services or increase tuition and fees. Often, they do both.

College Offers a Great Return on Investment

I personally don’t have a problem with spending a lot of money on college, because, as I mentioned on a previous post, education has a large affect of future earnings. Education is, in economic terminology, a private good. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask students to invest in their own potentially lucrative future. I’ve included the numbers from the 2003 US Census bureau below.

University Research Improve Local Economies

Local communities — and society as a whole — benefit nicely from universities. The knowledge discovered and technology created from university research are public goods. It’s reasonable to ask society to fund universities via taxes.

Top research universities seem to have the greatest effect. Silicon Valley, for example, is known as a bastion of innovation for decades. The average private sector employee there earns $69,107 — 87% higher than the national average. Most economists and business professors credit Cal and Stanford for playing an important role in establishing Silicon Valley.

In the end, the educational system is expensive. But it’s also very valuable — to both students and society. Should the government fund universities? Yes. Should students fund their own education? Yes. The universities probably need both streams of income plus more. As for the convicts, I wouldn’t bother sending them to Harvard. Cambridge is a nice place… sending prisoners there would seem like a reward. But I hear that New Haven is pretty dismal.

Posted on July 2nd, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: economic theory, societal concerns | 2 Comments »

First, let me congratulate my pastor, Bruce Reyes-Chow, for being elected moderator of the Presbyterian Church (USA) General Assembly. This means he’s the de facto figurehead of a large protestant denomination. And the big cheese in dealing with dire questions like mine.

Pastor Bruce Reyes-Chow grapples with the future of the church

A Little Self Reflection

Many church insiders — Presbyterian ones at least — have a dire view of the church. We’re old and stodgy. The younger generation isn’t coming through our doors. We’re in desperate need of change. Frankly, yes, we believe the church is losing its relevance.

Independent research corroborates this negative sentiment. One religious study report from the Pew Forum calls American Protestantism “diverse, fragmented, and declining in number”. This protestant decline can be seen clearly in the last two decades. During the 1970s and 1980s, between 60% and 65% adults self-identified as protestant, according to General Social Surveys (GSS). By 2006, the GSS reported this number dropped to 50%. In other words, 10-15% of Americans have recently walked away from the protestant church.

A Funky Urban New Church

By electing Pastor Bruce, the presbytery is hoping to spark a vibrant church transformation. Bruce described his own church, Mission Bay Community Church (MBCC), a “funky urban new church”. The Presbyterian blogosphere (yes.. they exist) is buzzing with excitement. They expect this pastor/geek/moderator to usher in Presbyterian 2.0. I just pray that Presbyterian 2.0 is better than Microsoft Vista.

MBCC happens to be the church that Hayley and I attend. Sure, it’s different in some ways. It’s well-reviewed in yelp. We drink fair-trade coffee during service. And the sermons regularly prompt a dialogue with the congregation. Mostly, it’s just a church. We sing. We pray. We worship God. It’s distinctly San Franciscan, and it’s unapologetically Christian. Yes. Christians can thrive in San Francisco.

It would be a big mistake to formuliacly mimic MBCC around the country. Can you imagine how contrived this would seem?

• A nationwide Presbyterian Yelp campaign: “Yelp your church for Jesus’ sake”.
• Fair trade coffee in all church services: “Your local Presbyterian church, now offering coffee with Christ”.

Don’t Raze the Old Churches

I believe that old churches have a lot to offer. When I was on vacation in Montana, I visited a Presbyterian Church in Whitefish. It was a stereotypically old church. I’d estimate the average age to be 60 years or more. They sat in pews and sang hymns. The church had beautiful stained glass windows. The preacher wore a robe. And they talked a lot about death, mostly in a positive comforting way.

This talk of death made me realize that the world changes too quickly for seniors. Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine a life where a handful of your friends pass away every year. With each death, a bit of your community and your shared memories are ripped away from you. Each friend’s passing marks a profound, frightening, and irreversible change — a change over which you cannot control.

By looking at the church from a I-can’t-control-the-frightening-changes perspective, old and stodgy traditions don’t feel all that old and stodgy. Rather, they’re familiar and comforting. The pews and robes and hymns are all reassuring. They are tactile reminders of God’s unwavering nature. To many, the old traditions of the church are deeply important and relevant.

Treasure Old Traditions and Build New Ones

Razing old churches would alienate a core contingency. Senior citizens need the church’s community and reassurance as much — if not more — than any of the rest of us. Younger folks (or at least younger-minded folks) ought to respect how seniors want to worship.

The elder establishment of the church must return the favor, especially if they want to reach the younger generation. Each community needs to find its own way of worshiping, whether it’s in pews or lawn chairs, hymns or hip-hop. The lessons of Jesus are always relevant. Each generation and each community must find its own way to tell his story… in a way that’s relevant to them.

Posted on June 26th, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: Christian tradition, church, diary worthy | 1 Comment »

Hello from Whitefish, a little town of 5,000 people nestled between the national parks and forests of Western Montana. I’m traveling with my family, sans Hayley, to experience the natural beauty of Glacier National Park.

It’s good for city boys like me to venture out. During our travels, we spotted two moose, a family of bison, and a pair of suckling baby fawn. I also drove dirt roads, hiked mountainous trails, rode a horse, and got bitten by mosquitoes. But during this trip I got more than just nature. I got an opportunity to reevaluate my city-centric stereotypes of sparsely populated Americana.

People from Montana are More Godly

I arrived in Montana laden with unconfirmed assumptions and biases:

1. Montana is sparsely populated
2. This means rural
3. Rural areas are less desirable than urban areas
4. Rural areas are cheaper
5. Rural areas are behind the times (some may call them backwards)
6. Montana is ethnically homogeneous (all white)
7. Therefore it’s not diverse
8. And non-diverse places are racist
9. Montanans are mostly Republican
10. They’re more conservative
11. And more Godly

It’s interesting that my beginning assumptions are correct: Montana is sparsely populated (at least relative to the parts of California where I’ve lived); Montana is predominantly white; and Montana is considered a red Republican state. But my following conclusions are mostly wrong.

• Whitefish, Montana is a very beautiful town — much cleaner and more pleasant than my beloved San Francisco.
• Real estate prices are surprisingly high in Whitefish. (A two-bedroom town house is asking $300,000).
• Montana is quite diverse. Not ethnically. But people move to Whitefish from around the country.
• I’ve not seen or experienced any racism.
• Montanans seem more libertarian than traditionally conservative. My tally of presidential candidate signs — Barak Obama: 0; John McCain: 0; Ron Paul: 13.

But are Montanans more Godly? I don’t know. I’ve seen a lot of churches out here. But I also see a lot of churches in San Francisco. I’m going to try to hunt down a local church tomorrow morning. Pray that I don’t get sucked into a Montanan cult.

Posted on June 21st, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: church, diary worthy | No Comments »

“Who do think should be our next president?” I asked Bonnie, a good friend and fellow traveler on a recent weekend trip.

“Either Hillary or Obama. I don’t care which,” she said.

“Why?” I was perplexed. Most Democrats loved one candidate and, therefore, disliked the other.

“I want a woman or an African American as a president. I’d be happy with either,” Bonnie replied.

I thought that voting based upon demographics was dumb. I told her so. Bonnie politely and assertively disagreed with me.

Bonnie and Me

Let me first explain that Bonnie’s like the sister I never had. Well… I have a sister, Miranda, who is a wonderful sister. So, Bonnie’s like the purple-loving Spanish-fluent half-Mexican psychologist sister I never had.

Bonnie and I are both outgoing, social, competitive, and eager for new experiences. In fact, Bonnie made an entire speech on our wedding explaining how we are alike and how our respective spouses, George and Hayley, are alike (though you can’t tell from their blogs).

There’s one big exception. Bonnie experiences the word primarily through her feelings; I experience the world primarily through my thoughts. It’s almost stereotypical, then, that I pursued an education in engineering and business, while she became a doctor of psychology.

Bonnie and I have great sibling-like debates. She’s articulate; she’s smart (after all she’s a Cal Bear); and she won’t back down. I bring my technological and economic perspective. She brings her psychology and humanistic perspective. I invariably learn something from her every time we debate. This presidential candidate discussion was no different, except it took me months to see her wisdom.

Race Matters

When I think about race and politics, I assume the worst. Racism and all of its related offspring — slavery, discrimination, economic disparity, hate crimes, and even racial preference — have been a big ugly mark on American history.

Psychologists and economists are both well aware of the economic disparity between African American communities and the rest of the country. The average (median) African American household income, $31,969 in 2006, is significantly less than the average American household income of $48,281 in 2006. Most believe that education is the solution. The problem is that the black community isn’t doing very well in education achievement, relative to the rest of the country.

Bonnie, as a psychologist, understood something that I didn’t: the value of an African-American role model. Obama’s presidential candidacy offers inspiration and hope to black students around the country. I thought this role model rhetoric was just “warm-fuzzy” talk. But recently I heard about changes… small changes, but important ones.

On an NPR report, a teacher at a predominantly African-American middle school stated that her students were working harder. More students in her class were turning in their homework. She says that she’s seen a noticeable difference in her student’s work ethic since January — the time when Obama became a serious presidential contender.

Could it Be?

Sure, we’re talking about anecdotal evidence from one teacher. But it’s potentially very powerful. Are we suggesting that the mere symbol of a bi-racial president would inspire students and thereby single-handedly improve education around the country for children of color? A simple role model can be a step closer to racial income equality?

These are some rather audacious claims. I’m currently not a Barak Obama supporter. If this were true, then maybe, it just could be… change that I can believe in.

Posted on June 13th, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: brazen, economic theory, societal concerns | 5 Comments »

This past Sunday, I coordinated a volunteer event for my church at the SF Food Bank. I gathered 22 participants, who represent some of the most educated and talented people I know. We had doctors and lawyers, scientists and scholars, entrepreneurs and business managers. We had fashion designers, musicians, publishers, teachers, and engineers. This group of talented Mission Bay Community Church (MBCC) attenders headed down to 900 Pennsylvania St, eager to make a small contribution to society.

What’s the Fair Market Price of Our Volunteer Team?

Ask any employer. Skilled labor is very expensive in the US. Therefore, the market price of our volunteer team ought to be pretty pricey.

The most “expensive” members of our volunteer team were probably the lawyers. The average billing rate for a U.S. law firm associate is $348/hour. At the other end of the billing scale are probably the teachers. Still, private tutors on craigslist charge $25-$35/hour, which is nothing to sneeze at. When I was working at Deloitte Consulting, my billing rate went as high as $182/hour (don’t worry… they paid me a wee fraction of that).

I’m going to use a conservative estimate of $40/hour per worker. Not counting our three children volunteers, who are legally forbidden to work for pay in California, we had 19 laborers. With 19 adult laborers for $40/hour and 3 child laborers thrown in for free, our team is worth $760/hour. The food bank got about two hours of work out of us. That’s the equivalent of $1520 of labor, by my estimate.

Working at the Food Bank

When we got to the food bank, the volunteer coordinator took a quick look at our team’s beautiful and talented individuals a found our shared common skill: manual labor. Specifically, he tapped our ability to package frozen spaghetti.

We formed two pasta-packing assembly lines. At the start of each assembly line was a gigantic box of frozen bulk spaghetti. Our two boxes held over 1,000 lbs of pasta, enough noodles to completely fill my Toyota Camry. Our assignment was to package this spaghetti into 1-lb bags.

I’d be the first to admit that I’m not one for manual labor. I had a brief stint at the plastic bag heat-sealing station. I worked opposite an elementary school aged boy — one of those children legally forbidden to work for pay. He quickly ousted me in favor of his older sister. I spent the rest of the time acting like a supervisor: wandering the assembly lines, doing odd jobs, and chatting with people.

The Value of Our Work

At the end of our volunteering event, the SF Food Bank coordinator told us that this shift (MBCC had two of the five assembly lines) was one of the most productive. Together we had packaged over 2,300 lbs of spaghetti.

As somebody who works behind a desk all day, I found it quite satisfying to see the outcome of our work. The gigantic boxes of bulk spaghetti was almost completely empty. Instead, we had pallets and pallets of packaged pasta.

Did the food bank make good use of our $1520 of labor? The closest comparison I could find was the USDA commodity prices on oats. Bulk oats, in 500-lb bins, sold for $0.07/lb. Packaged oats, which comes in twelve 3-lb bags, sold for $0.33/lb. Both require a minimum order of 2,000 lbs. The packaging, therefore, is worth about $0.26/lb. By neglecting the cost of the facilities, equipment, and overhead and by giving ourselves a very generous estimate of 1,000 lbs of packaged pasta, we can estimate the value of our work to be $260. Divide that by 38 worker-hours. In the end, what do we get?

We produced equivalent $6.82/hr of work — a full 25% less than San Francisco’s minimum wage law.

Oh well. So much for comparing ourselves with law firm associates. At least we had fun taking pictures of ourselves with hairnets and rubber gloves.

Posted on June 10th, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: charitable, church, diary worthy, economic theory | 1 Comment »

My buddy/blog reader/fellow football fan is very frustrated that he cannot post comments on my site — especially about “Does God care about Football?”. If you’re facing this problem, please send me an email. (My facebook email address is up to date).

I am the writer/webmaster/wordpress admin/sys admin/network engineer/hardware technician for my websites twocoppercoins.com/twosmallcoins.com. So, if there’s a problem with this website, I really ought to be able to figure it out.

Posted on June 9th, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: Uncategorized | 3 Comments »

I love God. And I love football. Every so often the two worlds collide, and it’s awesome. During the sermon this morning, Pastor Bruce was taking about how people — like football players — thank God after a victory.

“Really??” Bruce asked, “Does God REALLY care about football??”

I saw Tiffany, the church worship director, nod furiously from the front pew. I would agree with Tiffany. How could God NOT care about football? Then again, I might be biased. So I decided to go to an impartial source: Google.

God and Football: What does Google say?

A quick Google search on “God and Football” yielded some surprisingly insightful results. Here’s a splattering of what I found:

• JollyBlogger asked whether God loved football. His conclusion was no, even though he personally loves football. “We often seem to want God to validate our idols and this is a good example”, he states.
• Writer Michael English penned a church skit about football uniforms. He replaced the armor of God analogy with the football uniform. He spoke about “pads of faith”, the “team sheet of salvation”, and the ball representing the “Good News of Peace”. It’s humorous. Too bad it concludes that God cares about the other football.
• School principal Jody McLoud gave a passionate speech about how the Supreme Court has banned their tradition of a football game prayer. She argues that everything from gay marriages to earth day can be discussed at school. “However,” she states, “if anyone uses this facility to honor God and ask Him to bless this event with safety and good sportsmanship, Federal Case Law is violated.”

Hmm… it’s clear that humans care about God and about football. But it doesn’t really answer the question.

So, does God care about football?

I’d like to think that God, in his omniscient infinite-capacity state of being, can be bothered by trifling human hobbies such as football. After all, football is the careers and aspirations of thousands of good (and not so good) Christians.

I do, however, believe that it’s presumptuous to declare God to be on your side. Every football fan knows that the New England Patriot’s winning streak has more to do with Bill Belichick’s videotapes than God’s divine intervention.

Posted on June 1st, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: Christian tradition, chasing happiness, church | 2 Comments »

Considering that the PhD is the highest academic research degree awarded in the United States, PhD students use decidedly simple words to mark the milestones of their doctorate journey. In fact, the words they use sound like they come straight out of nursery school.

Take my favorite PhD candidate for example. This past weekend, Hayley “walked”. Her parents watched on proudly and applauded. Hayley’s not quite done yet. She still needs to “write” before she finishes up and gets her lollipop.

Confused? Don’t worry. I’ve put together a doctorate dictionary below, in honor of Hayley’s “walking”:

walk: (verb)
1. [historic use] to participate in the graduation ceremony to recognize the completion of a PhD.
2. [common use] to participate in the graduation ceremony to signal to one’s professor the intent of completing one’s PhD very, very soon.

write: (verb)
1. to compose a doctorate thesis or dissertation.
2. to cram years of PhD research into a large tome, while wondering whether anyone will ever read it

hell: (noun)
1. a place of torment and misery, where the wicked are sent to pay for their immorality
2. a research laboratory in Richmond (in terminology coined by Dr. Shyam). Usage: “Because I am running experiments on embryonic stem cells, I will be going to hell this weekend.”

lollipop: (noun)
1. an anti-climatic piece of candy offered to a PhD student at U.C. Berkeley when she completes her PhD requirements and submits her signed and completed thesis, the culmination of years of study, research, effort, and toil.
2. a sucker.

support: (noun)
1. friends and family that provide funds, emotional support, and companionship to a PhD student through the challenges and toils of graduate school.
2. a grateful spouse, namely Ryan, who is very proud of the work and achievements of Hayley, his dearest PhD candidate.

Posted on May 28th, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: chasing happiness, diary worthy, relationships (and money) | 1 Comment »

While Americans were debating same-sex marriages, a social issue of let’s face it — relatively minor consequence, a global debate involving a 100,000 lives was pushed quietly into the background. I’m referring to the Myanmar cyclone victims and their military government’s obstinate refusal to accept international aid. Even weeks after the cyclone passed, an estimated 2.5 million Burmese survivors face malnutrition, homelessness, and disease.

International relief organizations stood at the door, eager to help. But the ruling junta would not allow foreigners in, fearing an overthrow of power. Multinational organizations like the UN and the Association of Southeast Asian Nations leaned heavily on the Myanmar government. Finally, the political leaders caved and allowed aid workers in.

How many thousands of needless deaths occurred due the junta’s stubbornness?

Forceful Charity

A week ago the Economist posed this question: Can we (and should we) force our help upon Myanmar? Foreign intervention is allowed for atrocities like genocide and ethnic cleansing. International militaries are legally sanctioned to protect the victims and enter the country, regardless of the governments stance.

Natural disasters, like this cyclone, are surely different. From a pragmatic standpoint, it doesn’t make sense to risk military confrontation for humanitarian aid. But morally, can an “invasion” be justified to save lives?

Caring or Overbearing?

Let’s bring this morality question closer to home. Two weeks ago we were at Dave & Busters (D&B) celebrating Jon’s birthday. I was happily drinking my 25-ounce mug of beer when someone commented that there were a lot of pregnant women hanging out at D&B. It was strange. D&B has a lot of beer. Pregnant women tend to avoid places with a lot of alcohol. Looking up at the bar, I wondered:

Can a bartender refuse service to a pregnant woman? Is it ethical to serve a pregnant woman alcohol? Is it ethical to refuse to respect a woman’s wishes and NOT serve her, because she’s pregnant?

How about if we see her drinking the beer? Can we go and pry it out of her hands? After all… that’s kinda like forcing our way into Myanmar.

Posted on May 23rd, 2008 by Ryan
Filed under: charitable, societal concerns | 1 Comment »